Handrails from Heaven

I have started to work out. And to be honest, i have STARTED to work out a kajillion times. I am yet to be convinced this time will last any longer then the last 5 times this year i have started. (yes, i do mean 2011)

BUT! I have a goal now. Not just skinny! Not that skinny was ever a goal. I like to be healthy. I have big hips, (thanks dad, your side of the family gets my jaded appreciation) and big boobs and big shoulders. I'm not exactly the string bean type. I'm more like...uuummmm.....the pickle type. Just broad...i even have wide feet.

This last week, my dear dear friend Jenny (Hi Jenny!) sent me a link on my facebook and asked if i want to join her in doing a 10K run. Only...this one is all in the MUD!

I have never done a 10K. I have never done a 1K. I DON'T LIKE RUNNING. Please remember back to the "big boobs" comment. Not exactly a runners body type. However, i have always wanted to do a marathon! I was super close to doing the Rock and Roll Marathon in Seattle the summer of 2008, but i couldn't actually figure out how to do the marathon and not have to run at all. Seemed there was no getting around it. So i waited until the registration date passed and then pretended to be bummed i forgot. So sad for me.

Getting back to the original story, i went over to Jake's house the other day to work out. Jake, my brother and Crossfit trainer is great. Really he is. I love him as a brother so so much, but as a trainer, i'm not so sure i share the sentiment. I do appreciate him when i get there, thinking "This is going to be a good workout, but darn it why can't he keep the gym warm. This place is FREEZING!" Then we get started with the workout and i think. He could be a little less attentive...why is he always watching me. What if i don't want to could by ones....i want to count by threes. And i don't WANT to squat all the way down so my bum reaches the ball on the ground. My bum is fine right at thigh level. But no, he proceedes to encourage me and tell me i'm doing great which he really makes me believe it and then i push harder and just get more and more mad at him for watching me! Then, half way through the work out i get mad that he doesn't have a darn air conditioner in the place, i mean GEEZE, it it too much to ask to get a little air! Finally, the time comes to end the workout and i feel like i could hug him for saying we are done. And the appreciateion is back.

When i went to his house the other day, Jake told me that we were going to do a fitness test to see what my level was at. I said cool, it would be good to know. Thinking inside my head "No thank you, thanks for playing. I think i will just go home. I'm done already".

We started with the rowing machine and i was supposed to row 500meters. Then do 30 squats, then 20 push ups and then 10 pull ups. And i was supposed to do all of that, 3 times. And be timed on it.

After 45 minutes, i was done with round one.

I looked at jake and said "It's been fun. Peace!"

And....i left. This whole 3 rounds thing...i'm sure he was just kidding anyways, right?

So the next day, which was yesterday, i was only a little sore. It was hard to squat down and pick things up and it was just a tight pull i could feel. Not horrible, but not comfortable either.

Then.I.Woke.Up.Today.

WHOLE NEW BALL GAME!

Text to Jake #1:
7:53 am
"OMG I am so sore today! I had to keep telling myself to NOT walk like a retard just getting down the stairs from my bedroom. I LOVE IT!!!"

(i said that love it part...but really....i had far more ...colorful... words in my head at the time)

Text to Jake #2
1:04pm
"Holding off on the retard walk is impossible. I walk like a wounded gazell kicking one leg out first and then dragging the other behind it. This is stupid."


While out to lunch today, i was seated in a booth. A chair is hard enough to get up from and down to when you pretty much don't have control of your own thigh muscles, but a booth...oh gosh. I was pretty sure Jake had prayed for this to happen, cause really...all the tables were open. Why can't we sit there. I don't give a rip about your stupid "section".

Half way through lunch i had to use the restroom. But knowing what it entailed just to get there, i decided i could hold off. By the end of lunch i really had to go. I used my arms as leverage, propped myself up off the bench seat and sort of threw myself to the edge. I couldn't use my legs to go straight, you think i could make them push me sidways? HA! Didn't even try. I managed to make it to standing position without making too many scary faces and started limping towards the womens restroom.

I entered there and what do you know, out of all 4 stalls, some stupid person had to be in the handicap one. The only one with handle bars. I seriously contemplated waiting there until they left. I don't care that there are 3 empty stalls. I NEED HANDLE BARS PEOPLE! How else do you lower yourself down to the level that these toilets are at? My legs sure can't do it!

As a reach to try and save what little dignity i still had at this place, i politly walked past the "Stall From God" and used one of the others. But guess what?!1? Good news folks! They were so skinny and narrow that i was able to use the top of the toilet paper dispenser and the pressure of the wall on the other side to lower myself down. Success at last!!!!

I did my business, then started to go through my purse and clean it out, cause really...i wasn't ready to attemp to stand up. I was just recovering from sitting down. Finally, purse clean, nails clipped and emails responded too via blackberry, i was ready. I stood right up, did a little whince, zipped my pants, grabbed my purse, washed my hands and hobbled right back to my booth.

oh gosh...that booth.


The rest of day was not much better. I babysat in the evening and rough housing boys and i did not make for a very fun (at least on my part) evening. I managed though and i don't even think they noticed. I just said i was getting old.

Tomorrow, i go again back to Jake. He said that if i don't get back in there while i am in pain, then it will just have to start all over. And i don't want that. I can not gurantee handicap stalls anywhere and and little ones are too small to bring a walker into with me...i'm thought about it. The kind with the tennis bals on the feet and everything! If you ever see me with one of those, you KNOW i'm working out!

If i am able to really commit to going this month as often as possible to Jakes and i feel like i have acutally gotten somewhere with my self dicipline then i will consider signing up for the Mud Run.

I will tell you more about it later, but for now, i just need to work on getting through tonight. And making it to the gym tomorrow.

_

KIDS!

Tonight while babysitting, the two boys (5yrs and 3.5yrs) and I were rough housing and playing on the couch and then at one point i sat up from under the "tent" blanket and the 5 yr old behind me said " Hey...you wanna hair cut?" .

YIKES!


I quickly slided my butt away from his couch cusion and said politely "No Thank You" To which he replied, "Why not, we have REAL hair scissors. I could do it for you really fast and it would work really good cause the scissors and REAL ones. You know, for hair".

Again, i said "No Thank You!!!!!!"

I quickly changed the subject and we moved on, but believe me, my hair was up in a bun so fast. NO more cute little pony tail hanging free to be snipped. Just so he could show me that the REAL scissors work good.

_


While having craft time with AA the other day, we were just creating things with the craft paper we had and tape. It turned out great, and AA was doing well. We only had the one pair of adult scissors as i didn't want to go hunting around the house for a kid pair and AA is only 4, i was doing all the cutting. However, i went to get a pencil and found another pair of adult scissors and so i let her have her own pair.

She looked at me and said "Are you sure i am allowed to use these big things?" Ha ha... "Yeah, it's ok. I'm right here and will watch you", i said. She started cutting and was doing well and so i turned back to my own craft project and then she pipes up and says "You know, i'm not bleeding over here yet, so that means that i'm pretty good at this so you don't have to worry about watching me. You don't have to look over here anymore".

To which i responded, "ok, that is great that you are not bleeding, good job! However i am going to just check to make sure you are cutting straight...is that ok?"

She said yes.

We work well together.

Dating...or not.

Today, while creating something online, i completed my project and submitted it and the website said "thank you for using evite please view our sponsor below" i thought to myself that they were very polite with their asking so i would take a look. What do ya know...it was a business card making place!

Now, i don't need business cards, but theirs were just so cute! However, upon a closer look, i realized that they were not just BUSINESS cards. They now have other options! Like MOMMY cards where it says your name and who your kids are and your contact info. Like...who would you give that too? Who do you not know now, but all of a sudden meet and want to give that information to? And who doesn't have a blackberry or an iPhone where they can just magically make it appear on the other persons phone or something? How many do you carry around in your purse? If you carry 20 would that make you seem over confident that people actually WANT your info? If you only carry one could you have underlying self confidence issues?

But then...my favorite was on this advertisement. It was a DATING card! It said

David Ross
"Fun personality and looking for a relationship" (or something just as stupid)
Contact info followed. Cell, email and twitter.

That got me thinking. What would i ever do with a dating card, but first, what would i put on it?
Here are some options:

Heidi Fields
Looking to change my last name. Please text me with yours to see if you even qualify.

or

Heidi Fields
Likes to color, hoard Cheeze-Its and travel. Not in that order. Usually all at once.

or

Heidi Fields
Average young adult woman currently jobless and seeking employment. Not necessarily my own but maybe a guy that has a job and can provide for my lack of desire to have a regular one. Willing to bear children and perform household duties. However you get to deal with the snot.


Once i have obtained these cards, when would it be appropriate to give them out? Would they make a person look even more stupid then they already are, or more sophisticated? I don't know anyone that would have those made for serious...maybe as a joke.

I think i will hold off for now.

-

KIDS!

The other day, i was babysitting a little 4 year old boy and we were driving to the store. When we got in the car i asked him what he wanted to listen to on the radio. He replied with "any station that plays Van Halen" and he was dead serious.
I couldn't find any.
So we rode in silence.

-

Dear Lord,

Thank you for another great day! It amazes me the way you answer prayers sometimes. And how you can "kill two birds with one stone" and bless two people with one act in completely different ways. You know what I'm talking about!

Please melt all the snow overnight. Thanks.

Love you!

Heidi

Hopes, Dreams and Cheez-It Crackers

My laptop has been resting for the last two months. I have used it once since i got home and then the battery died and then the power cord pooped out on me. Was that perfect timing as it was just after i got home and not still needing it for classes or was is bad timing...for i don't know why. We will go with good.

A new power cord is en route and i should be able to post more regularly then. Not that i have ever posted regularly...it is more of a mood blog thing i have here. If i am in the mood..i write! If not...i don't. I obviously feel no responsibility to my readers. Maybe that will come someday. Depending on when i wrap this sucker up.

-

PAST
Went to school and took some classes but got only credits and nothing else
PRESENT
Working at Massage Envy and babysitting. (A LOT!)
FUTURE
Obtain my massage therapy license and get on with my life already!


Let me explain.

So this last year was great. I had a love hate relationship with school, as i'm sure most people do (unless you are my sister, then school is just a step below heaven and why would you ever want to be done and leave that?!?!?) and i accomplished and learned a lot. However, i did not leave with a degree. I feel good about what i did accomplish, but i don't feel as though i really accomplished much academically. Personally is a whole different story. I sort of feel as thought i wish i had gotten a degree of some sort, but i'm not sure how i would have done that. I have thought about transferring my credits over here someone and finishing my AA, like at Green River or BCC or something like that, but i don't know. I'm not sure that is a goal of mine so would i be doing just to say i did it or would i be doing it for a reason that has a lasting result? We will come back to that.

Since i have been home, the plan has always been to start Massage Therapy school. I will be going to Renton Tech College if everything goes as planned. I was going to start this coming Spring, but thought that i would really like to pay for this up front. I don't want to go into debt. So i have decided that i will work this year and save enough to pay for school in full when i register.I feel that to be the best way and to feel as thought i don't have to work to live and to pay off debt. I can just work because i want to. So, Jan 2012 i will be starting school. I am planning on making an appointment with an adviser there in order to find out what i should be doing this year to prepare and how much it will be exactly and any pre tests i have to take i could get those done now. Also, what i really want to do, and this plan is only in my head and not actually thought out all the way, but i would love to go to school, get my LMP license and then work as a Massage Therapist with my own practice, while also going back to school to specialize in Child Massage and then start working at Children's Hospital. Now, i have NO IDEA if there is a need for this, or a market for such a degree, but i do know that i want to do it. I want to be able to use my career to help kids. And this is how i have chosen to do it. I would still have my own practice where i massage adults, but i would have my main career at the hospital or somewhere like it.

Now, to get to the point of having all this money, i am going to need to get a real job. I have been working at Massage Envy at the front desk just covering for a person that was traveling for the holidays but that gig is up the end of Jan. And as i know i could find enough nannying or babysitting jobs to fill up my days, i just don't know that it will work. I need health insurance, and i need to be a good tax payer and i need some stability. Plus, as much as i love to babysit, sometimes it takes up half of what i make just to get there. Living out in the boonies where i am i have to fill my gas tank nearly every other day. The plan is to move closer to town, like Issaquah area again, but i don't know when. Feb is my month for getting a job. I know i can do it. I just have not tried yet.


Life is interesting right now. I have no idea what i am doing or where i am going, i just know i am fine with whatever happens. Lord knows what he is doing. I will just go where he sends me.

-

I have had an addiction to Cheez-it's as of late. I don't know why. They are just so...crackery and cheesy and bite size and oh so yuummy! I need to kick this habit. The current bag (which is hiding so nobody else in the house can find it and eat any) is nearly done. I am thinking i will just do this COLD TURKEY! (cold turkey? where did that saying even come from? what does a cold turkey have to do with ANYTHING!) Please keep me in your prayers. GOD CARES ABOUT THE SMALL STUFF TOO!!!!
PS. Did you even know Cheez-It scrabble existed? Do you know how much fun that would be? OH MY WORD! I'm on a mission now. F.I.N.D. T.H.E.M.

-

I am going to start a new little section of this blog where i tell you of a funny kid story. I keep getting told by my family that i should write all this down, but this is as far as i am going to get for now. I don't remember most of them.

KIDS
The other night, i was watching two adorable 4 year old girls. They really were sweet. We had so much fun! One of them i had watched before, and it was at her house, the other, i had met that night for the first time. Their parents were going out to a movie together so we got to party together.

I walked into the house, and set my stuff down. Was introduced to the newbies and started to unpack the craft i had brought to do. This new little girl, lets call her LL, came up to me and said "You are beautiful AND you brought crafts, this is going to be a good night!" to which i responded "I AGREE!" The next sentence out of her mouth was "Later can we plan make believe and you can play my ugly stepmother?".

I said no.

Later on that night, the girls were told that they would have some popcorn and watch some On Demand shows and then fall asleep in the living room. We pulled out a mattress and put it on the floor and they laid down about 8:30 and started to watch some Bearnstein Bears (how do you even spell that?!?!) and by 11:00, AA was ready to go to sleep but since LL was wide awake she was trying to be brave and stay awake with her. So i looked around on the good ol On Demand and found a Sprout Kids goodnight show! YAY! I turned on the 30 minutes of lullabies and AA was out so fast we hardly had gotten started. Then, about 10 minutes into it, LL popped her head up, looked at me and said "This music makes me sleepy, and sad". So i said "why does it make you sad?" She replied, "you know those times that your heart just has a burst of emotion, and you just need to let it out?"

I said...."uuummm...yeeeaaahhhh...." sort of with a leary voice, thinking YOU ARE 4...are you for real?

LL said to me, "well, that is how this music makes me feel. But i will choose to sleep instead of cry".

I said "good choice".

She was asleep within 5 minutes.

The End.


Dear Lord,

Thank you for providing what i need when i need it, even if sometimes i don't agree with your timing beforehand. I know you know what you are doing. If i doubt you, it's not intentional, it is just my frustration being let out on you.
I have had a wonderful weekend and i owe it to you. Thank you for being there for me to vent to.

I love you.

Heidi

Startin Fresh

Chantel and I hanging with the whale


Eating lunch with friends




It is only 5 days into the new year and i am already feeling like it has gone by so fast. Where did those 5 days go? It was just new years eve like...yesterday!

What have i done with this new found fresh slate of mine?

Nothing.

Day One: Stayed in PJ's all day...figuring that a new year is like a new car...run it the first few days the way you want it to run the rest of it's life. Step on the gas hard every time you get in it and the car will expect that every time. Going slow will come hard. I figured that if i started my new year off slow and in my pa-ja-ja's and kept them on a while...my year might see lots of relaxing days and cute pajamas.

Day Two: Worked at Massage envy starting at 9am. so much for taking things slow.

Day Three Four and Five...I don't remember. So much driving, so much eating, so much massage envy...not very much sleep.

So tonight, i have decided that it is time to start up this part of my life again and share with you what i am going through and how i am going through it.

I had to change the name of this here online journal of mine as this is no longer an African Adventure. But let me assure you, this new future of mine will for sure be always referring back to that year that changed my life for the better.

The new name was chosen only because i could not come up with anything better. I thought and thought...and kept coming back to this. Once you get over the fact that it has nothing, and i mean NOTHING to do with Christmas, you will see my name... sort of...Heidi Joy...and understand that this blog is me talking to the world about the problems and fun and adventures i get to experience in it and with it.

Comments are welcome and i am not opposed to changing the name.

Too Christmasy?
Too much NOT my name?
Should my name even be in it?
Something more clever?

you let me know.


Tomorrow i will start filling you in what i am doing with my life now. Not that i'm totally sure about it yet...but i will explain the best i can, the best i know how to.

Dear Lord,

Thank you for getting me through the holiday's and being able to appreciate my family and friends. I am excited for what you have in store for me this coming year and hopefully i can stay focused enough to make sure to ask your opinion about every decision i make.

I love you.

Heidi